In the last year, I’ve experienced a huge transition. I left New York (my home of 5 years) and the East Coast (my home since birth) to road trip across the country by myself and start a new chapter of my life in Los Angeles. I left the full time agency world to start my independent freelance studio. And amongst all of the new and different things I’ve found in this new phase, a love for pole dancing performance and nutrition have become key players, right alongside design, illustration, and typography. Through this journey of self, I’ve done my best to share these new and developing components of my life as honestly as I can. There are moments of uncertainty, insecurity, and doubt. I wonder how my design audience feels about videos of me dancing, sometimes scantily clad, on a pole popping up in their social media feeds. I wonder if they tire of photos of my breakfast. I wonder if sharing my moments of weakness about starting and building my own business on another side of the country will have anyone think I am any less capable. But a funny thing happens the moment I give those negative thoughts any bit of real estate in my mind: I come across someone who is going through the same exact struggle. The players may not be design and pole dancing, but brand strategy and candle making, writing and bodybuilding, web design and lifestyle blogging. I engage in conversations with these people, and they all seem to be dealing with the same fears and struggles.
The main questions I hear from creative freelancers are: How can I share more of myself and my personal interests without sharing every intimate detail? Where is the line? And how can I be authentic with my community and audience but make sure to not offend, isolate or otherwise turn off anyone from my work in doing so? This could be in regards to a blog, social media, or general correspondence. If you have any of these questions, you are in luck because there is a very simple answer: Man up. Goddess Brené writes that it’s not so much the “act of authenticity” that challenges the status quo but rather the “audacity of authenticity” that can make some people uncomfortable. Sharing personal parts of yourself will never be a) easy or b) accepted by everyone. And there will be growing pains.
There should be a process app for Realness, because it’s not a single point in time and space. There will never be a time where you say, “I made it! I am now fully authentic now!” It’s something that happens with each decision to post about your interests, your philosophies, your ethics or taste and how they inform your work. It’s a way to connect with people in a deeper and more genuine capacity. Luckily, this app actually exists. It’s called all social media, and it’s ours to show ourselves off however we see fit. The decision to be open and honest with the tools at our fingers is ours and ours alone.